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Photo-Caption Contest: Astronaut Urlacher

Last week's Photo-Caption Contest was one for the ages... and JerBear50 pulled the come-from-behind upset, in the biggest nail-biter yet.  Congratulations JerBear50!

Other engreeninations:

ThorCo

smudgers

HanelucaTC

IslandBoodler87

KtownBear

rdent4hof

BearFan611

Saint Ditka

Great job to all!

Previous winners:

ifuwannacrownem

ChiFan13

Qgee

ditkavsworld

JerBear50 would have had the privelege of choosing this week's pic, had he responded to my emails.  But, since he didn't, I am doing it for him.  JerBear50 will sit out of this week's competition, and will be able to participate next week.

For this week's contest, we have Adrian Peterson, Brian Urlacher, 50 Cent, Dwight Howard, and David Ortiz. 

Keep your submissions appropriate, and don't forget to wreck your favorites!

Astronauts_medium

 

Difficulty:  No Steroids

4 recs  |  Comment 108 comments |

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More from Windy City Gridiron

The Bears Blitz

Oct 2009 by wiltfongjr - 22 comments

Comments

Display:

Hey, my helmut is defective...

I use to look like the rest of family!

by BearFan611 on Jun 8, 2009 12:30 PM CDT reply actions   1 recs

Urlacher: "hope your packin 50, no telling what we are going to encounter."

Hear about the blind hooker, you gotta hand it to her.
Rex Grossman has to be a test-tube baby, cause he's not worth a f---!!!

by Bears fan 4-ever!!! on Jun 8, 2009 12:39 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Urlacher: "Damn it, I should've waited to fart until they had their helmets on...."

Because as far as we're concerned, there is still no team in the history of the NFL that could beat the '85 Bears.

by Ditkavsworld on Jun 8, 2009 12:49 PM CDT reply actions   2 recs

lmao, and Peterson doesn't look happy about it either.

Hear about the blind hooker, you gotta hand it to her.
Rex Grossman has to be a test-tube baby, cause he's not worth a f---!!!

by Bears fan 4-ever!!! on Jun 8, 2009 12:55 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

A baller, a slugger, a runner, a hitter and a dope ass lyrical spitter.

“take us to your damn leader punk!!!”

Hear about the blind hooker, you gotta hand it to her.
Rex Grossman has to be a test-tube baby, cause he's not worth a f---!!!

by Bears fan 4-ever!!! on Jun 8, 2009 12:51 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Clive Davis tries to bring back the boy-band scene

Introducing the newest boy-band….Vita-Men..filming the video for their new hit single “Travis Henry Got Nothing On Us”

(Asshole Sr) "If you learn one thing here, NEVER pass out in Ohio."

by ThorCo on Jun 8, 2009 12:57 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

not a caption, but more of a short story...

too bad these guys weren’t chosen to star in that armageddon movie… AP would’ve picked up that rock and started running with it… urlacher would’ve hit AP so hard, it would’ve broken in half!! 50 would’ve shot up one half while spittin lyrics so hard, the other half eventually crumbled into pieces small enough for ortiz to knock ’em out of the galaxy! then everybody would just hitch a ride back home courtesy of superman himself…

Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear.

by windycity72 on Jun 8, 2009 1:12 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

I wouldn't count on Ortiz hitting anything

"Well, we didn't block real good but we made up for it by not tackling."
- John McKay

by JerBear50 on Jun 9, 2009 3:15 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

One small step

for athletes, and one giant step for sports!

"I'm not so mean. I wouldn't ever go out to hurt anybody deliberately - unless it was, you know, important, like a league game or something." - Dick Butkus

"Invincibility lies in the defence; the possibility of victory in the attack." - Sun Tzu

by propheteer on Jun 8, 2009 1:16 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Revision

One small step for athletes, and one giant step for sportingkind!

"I'm not so mean. I wouldn't ever go out to hurt anybody deliberately - unless it was, you know, important, like a league game or something." - Dick Butkus

"Invincibility lies in the defence; the possibility of victory in the attack." - Sun Tzu

by propheteer on Jun 8, 2009 1:39 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

NASA Coordinator: OK fellas. It’s up to you to find the football that Jay Cutler just sent into orbit.

Think With Your Dipstick Jimmy!

by ifuwannacrownem on Jun 8, 2009 1:33 PM CDT reply actions   1 recs

Urlacher to Mission Control: “I swear to God, AP’s survival chord severed ITSELF!”

Rumor has it Alex Brown keeps Chris Simms' right index finger in his back pocket for good luck.

by HanelucaTC on Jun 8, 2009 1:36 PM CDT reply actions   2 recs

funny stuff!

- Smudgers

"Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch." - Dr. Percival Ulysses Cox

by smudgers on Jun 8, 2009 2:37 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Yes, he may be able to rap but...

fake as hell. Rec’d

Hear about the blind hooker, you gotta hand it to her.
Rex Grossman has to be a test-tube baby, cause he's not worth a f---!!!

by Bears fan 4-ever!!! on Jun 8, 2009 7:04 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

David Ortiz? Aren’t you batting under.200? The Red Sox should give 50 Cent a few AB’s at DH… he can’t do much worse.

by wiltfongjr on Jun 8, 2009 2:46 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

ok

in the amount of time to sign in, you totally stole my “only white guy” joke…

PC Load Letter? WTF does that mean?!

by ChiTown2ShineIn'09 on Jun 8, 2009 2:50 PM CDT up reply actions   1 recs

that's funny..rec'd

Hear about the blind hooker, you gotta hand it to her.
Rex Grossman has to be a test-tube baby, cause he's not worth a f---!!!

by Bears fan 4-ever!!! on Jun 8, 2009 7:05 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

and I was thinking pigment challenged joke

Hear about the blind hooker, you gotta hand it to her.
Rex Grossman has to be a test-tube baby, cause he's not worth a f---!!!

by Bears fan 4-ever!!! on Jun 8, 2009 7:06 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

that's hilarious!!!

Hear about the blind hooker, you gotta hand it to her.
Rex Grossman has to be a test-tube baby, cause he's not worth a f---!!!

by Bears fan 4-ever!!! on Jun 8, 2009 7:07 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

There can't be that much endorsement money out there

to make these guys look this gay. Somebody should fire their agent.

"The cup is not half empty and neither is the cup half full. The cup's just too damn big." -George Carlton

by Just Dave on Jun 8, 2009 2:54 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

I just realized that this is for vitamin water

That junk tastes like crap. How can they make enough money to make these guys look this bad? Here’s your caption “Only people who have no pride drink the crap were trying to sell.”

"The cup is not half empty and neither is the cup half full. The cup's just too damn big." -George Carlton

by Just Dave on Jun 8, 2009 2:56 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

OR

“One of these kids is doing his own thing, c’mon, can you tell which one?”

by Bearsguy34 on Jun 8, 2009 3:18 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

"This is so Lame"

“I think I was cooler at the beginning of the Old Spice Swagger Commercial”

“Hey 50…I challenge you to an ‘Honor Du-el’ !”

Unreasonable people make life difficult...

by WisBearsFan34 on Jun 8, 2009 3:27 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Urlacher is holding back his laugh

because it looks like he tied AP’s shoe laces together and he’s about to fall flat on his face.

If God had wanted man to play soccer, he wouldn't have given us arms.- Mike Ditka

by Hurricanes becoming Bears on Jun 8, 2009 4:12 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Carrie Underwood just walked by, as everyone watches her...

hence why everyone else is looking straight ahead and Howard is looking down

(Asshole Sr) "If you learn one thing here, NEVER pass out in Ohio."

by ThorCo on Jun 8, 2009 4:18 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

How can that be my kid?

I wasn’t even on Earth…..

by kingj41 on Jun 8, 2009 4:36 PM CDT reply actions   1 recs

haha

i like it

Tha Gov

by Bear_Nuts on Jun 14, 2009 1:30 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Yes, f'n funny and of course rec'd

Hear about the blind hooker, you gotta hand it to her.
Rex Grossman has to be a test-tube baby, cause he's not worth a f---!!!

by Bears fan 4-ever!!! on Jun 8, 2009 7:08 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

thanks

I finally put up a contender.

Being Who You Thought We Were Since 2005!

by Adam T on Jun 9, 2009 1:37 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Wrec'd

So you could go in the lead. Plus, if it would have come down to a tie, I would have demanded a dance off and no one wanted that, trust me.

- Smudgers

"Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch." - Dr. Percival Ulysses Cox

by smudgers on Jun 12, 2009 12:32 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

After leaving the restroom there was now 4 more guys that can

vouch…. Brian Urlacher’s piss really does sound like Niagra Falls.

Because as far as we're concerned, there is still no team in the history of the NFL that could beat the '85 Bears.

by Ditkavsworld on Jun 8, 2009 5:16 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Dwight Howard

and crew have resorted to looking in every corner of the universe for his offensive game.

"I'm not so mean. I wouldn't ever go out to hurt anybody deliberately - unless it was, you know, important, like a league game or something." - Dick Butkus

"Invincibility lies in the defence; the possibility of victory in the attack." - Sun Tzu

by propheteer on Jun 8, 2009 5:52 PM CDT reply actions   1 recs

The battle too big for earth

In an epic battle of athletes and a rapper, who will come out on top. The monster of midway? Superman? Purple Jesus? the Slugger? or the man who was shot and survived?

Bring back our honey bears...sick and tired of hearing about the dallas cowboy cheerleaders and the bars they go work at when they quit. cold weather + cheerleaders in skimpy outfits = lots of fun

by tomh115 on Jun 8, 2009 5:55 PM CDT reply actions   1 recs

Getting tired of all the fur coats and bling...

the fashion industry tries out this new fad on some of the USA’s top celebrities… will space suits be the next big craze?

"A lot of fans were drawn to me because they knew that whatever the score was, I was going to run as hard as I could on every play. You don't have that now, you have guys waiting for next week or even next year." - Walter Payton

by HoneyBear on Jun 8, 2009 6:10 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

The Monsters, Inc. scarers prepare for another launch...

(Incidentally, I saw the title was something about Urlacher and astronaut, and was expecting to see his head on Buzz Lightyear’s body when I clicked on this link.)

"They tried to take out the quarterback, and if they managed that, they tried to take out the backup." - Bears SB20 TE Emery Moorehead, on the mentality of *that* defense

by Spongie on Jun 8, 2009 6:28 PM CDT reply actions   1 recs

Cameraman to director: Hold on, I need a wide angle to get that much a-s into one shot.

Director: CUT! We’re shooting five people and you figure out NOW that you need a wide-angle!?!
Cameraman: I was actually just talking about 50 cent…

by SouthSidePolack on Jun 8, 2009 6:31 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Maury Povich: Who's da baby daddy?

Urlacher: “Damn, how’d i get myself into this shit?”

Hear about the blind hooker, you gotta hand it to her.
Rex Grossman has to be a test-tube baby, cause he's not worth a f---!!!

by Bears fan 4-ever!!! on Jun 8, 2009 7:15 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

I dont care who ya are..that's f'n funny!!!

Hear about the blind hooker, you gotta hand it to her.
Rex Grossman has to be a test-tube baby, cause he's not worth a f---!!!

by Bears fan 4-ever!!! on Jun 8, 2009 7:18 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

"A,B,C Easy as 1,2,3"

They’re just exactly like the Jackson 5 with Brian as the giant sized and muscular Michael (White glove(s) and all)… only completely different.

"The cup is not half empty and neither is the cup half full. The cup's just too damn big." -George Carlton

by Just Dave on Jun 8, 2009 9:21 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

BREAKING NEWS!!

Despite claims that no sounds can be heard in space, AP, Superman, 50 & Big Papi all claim to briefly hear waterfalls throughout the middle of the night

PC Load Letter? WTF does that mean?!

by ChiTown2ShineIn'09 on Jun 8, 2009 10:37 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Look at the expression on Urlacher's face:

“We should have never listened to Babich and stopped at Taco Bell after we got these damn suits on! Another great call by that d-bag!”

by BearFan611 on Jun 9, 2009 7:27 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Director: I'm not telling him, you tell him!

Producer: No way am I telling 50 that he’s just not cutting it.
Director: How about we just get that scrub to do it that we hired to be our errand boy; he’s thankful to us for even giving him a job.
Producer: Good call, he should do whatever we ask… Hey Grossman, get over here

- Smudgers

"Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch." - Dr. Percival Ulysses Cox

by smudgers on Jun 9, 2009 8:00 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Urlacher: The Right Stuff?

This crew of flunkies is more likely to get shot, fumble or strike out? What are they saying about my career? Overrated my ass!

by GallopingGhost on Jun 9, 2009 9:31 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

The Looked Disappointed in their return

Even in zero gravity, Vitamin Water still sucks.

by GallopingGhost on Jun 9, 2009 9:36 AM CDT reply actions   1 recs

Had to rec this

Bc Vitamin Water is HORRIBLE!!!

"The phone's for you, I think it's the Devil."

by Acreman20 on Jun 10, 2009 3:42 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

This Crew was assembled

To find intelligent life on other planets that might think Vitamin Water doesn’t suck.

by GallopingGhost on Jun 9, 2009 9:37 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Sadly the group found out that this shoot was for Vitamin Water and not Tang...

they were also found to be dejected when told that Tang is actually an refreshing beverage and not something you pick up in the club.

Because as far as we're concerned, there is still no team in the history of the NFL that could beat the '85 Bears.

by Ditkavsworld on Jun 9, 2009 10:13 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

meanwhile on bizarro world...

peyton hillis, ray lewis, eminem, luke walton, and mark teixeira prepare themselves for the coming invasion.

sorry, hillis is the only white version of a RB that i could come up with that isn’t deceased.

by genetic on Jun 9, 2009 10:42 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Unable to see what AP is holding

Urlacher tackles him for a 3 yard loss. AP then goes on to have a career worst year.

!

by Qgee on Jun 9, 2009 11:07 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Exactly.

Be nice. Flag comments that you think are offensive. Use the "reply" button. Drink plenty of water. Compliment others. "Rec" comments and posts you like. Don't call people names. If you don't like someone's comment, attack the comment and not the commentor. Learn the difference in your/you're, then/than, to/too. Exercise. Relax. Stretch often. Find good in the world.

by Dane Noble on Jun 9, 2009 11:15 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Wrecked just becasue.

Because as far as we're concerned, there is still no team in the history of the NFL that could beat the '85 Bears.

by Ditkavsworld on Jun 9, 2009 11:20 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

NASA lowered the education requirment

For astronauts today when a sociology major, a criminology major, a GED recipient, a high school grad and a Dominican high school grad all partook in the latest shuttle mission.

by GallopingGhost on Jun 9, 2009 3:13 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

50 Cent...

The only man in this photo who excels at his profession by doing drugs, carrying weapons, being a former drug distributor/ felon, and giving a false sense of self-worth to millions of mindless youth through rhyming words that promote all of his selfish and demeaning behaviors! And he’s still on a Vitamin Water commercial..

TAKE THAT PROFESSIONAL ATHLETES!

by PolishSausage.Ditka.Bears. on Jun 9, 2009 4:17 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

haha not only that

he was a partial owner – made some stupid money from vitamin water when they sold it to pepsi

by ChicagoFan on Jun 9, 2009 11:56 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Heres my shot

Urlacher-" This is a comercial for Vitamin Water? I thought it was a comercial for the next michelin man."

by eross226 on Jun 9, 2009 6:43 PM CDT reply actions   1 recs

Urlacher says..

Damn, the moon? I already hate cheese…

"I can accept failure, but I can't accept not trying" - Michael Jordan, the one and only...

by LPLancer23 on Jun 10, 2009 12:27 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

THREAD UPDATE

So, we are continually getting new members, and it is hard to keep up with who has only been here a week or 2 versus a month or 2. So let me just throw this out there, for those who may not understand.

To “wreck” a comment, or “rec”, or “recommend”, you have to click the “actions” button, then actually click “rec”. You can’t just say “wreck” in a comment… you actually have to push the button!

Be nice. Flag comments that you think are offensive. Use the "reply" button. Drink plenty of water. Compliment others. "Rec" comments and posts you like. Don't call people names. If you don't like someone's comment, attack the comment and not the commentor. Learn the difference in your/you're, then/than, to/too. Exercise. Relax. Stretch often. Find good in the world.

by Dane Noble on Jun 10, 2009 10:22 AM CDT reply actions   1 recs

Wrec'd

- Smudgers

"Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch." - Dr. Percival Ulysses Cox

by smudgers on Jun 10, 2009 10:28 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Hilarious. Nicely done Smudgers.

Because as far as we're concerned, there is still no team in the history of the NFL that could beat the '85 Bears.

by Ditkavsworld on Jun 10, 2009 10:30 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Thanks for the literal example of what I am talking about.

Be nice. Flag comments that you think are offensive. Use the "reply" button. Drink plenty of water. Compliment others. "Rec" comments and posts you like. Don't call people names. If you don't like someone's comment, attack the comment and not the commentor. Learn the difference in your/you're, then/than, to/too. Exercise. Relax. Stretch often. Find good in the world.

by Dane Noble on Jun 10, 2009 10:45 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

You know I am here for you!

- Smudgers

"Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch." - Dr. Percival Ulysses Cox

by smudgers on Jun 10, 2009 10:49 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Someone had to go and ruin the joke by actually wrecking it! Ugh!

- Smudgers

"Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch." - Dr. Percival Ulysses Cox

by smudgers on Jun 10, 2009 4:44 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

I noticed that too...

thought for some reason you got confuserized and did it.

Be nice. Flag comments that you think are offensive. Use the "reply" button. Drink plenty of water. Compliment others. "Rec" comments and posts you like. Don't call people names. If you don't like someone's comment, attack the comment and not the commentor. Learn the difference in your/you're, then/than, to/too. Exercise. Relax. Stretch often. Find good in the world.

by Dane Noble on Jun 10, 2009 4:51 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Nope.

Confusersized?!?! I’ll have to try and use that one in a meeting tomorrow at work!

- Smudgers

"Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch." - Dr. Percival Ulysses Cox

by smudgers on Jun 10, 2009 4:57 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Make sure WCG get confuserized in the glossary! :)

Because as far as we're concerned, there is still no team in the history of the NFL that could beat the '85 Bears.

by Ditkavsworld on Jun 11, 2009 8:56 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

I'm standing and applauding you for you efforts at this moment.

I don’t care what my co-workers think. Bravo….

Because as far as we're concerned, there is still no team in the history of the NFL that could beat the '85 Bears.

by Ditkavsworld on Jun 11, 2009 9:55 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

i have to point out

that you misspelled your dictionary entry though. sorry.

i believe cofuserize actually means to fuse or join together seemingly random things into a nonsensical situation, as in “i have no idea why these five guys have been cofuserized into this vitamin water commercial”.

by genetic on Jun 11, 2009 1:31 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

I love it, put it in Urban Dictionary

I got a few words I’ve defined in there

(Asshole Sr) "If you learn one thing here, NEVER pass out in Ohio."

by ThorCo on Jun 11, 2009 6:45 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

wrecktified

“disorientate” has long been one of my pet peeves. Thanks for pointing it out, even though (or should that be “irregardless”?) of the fact that 50% of the readers are asking “What’s wrong with ‘disorientate’ ?”

May the wind be always at your back, and may your placekicker have icewater in his veins.

by juperee on Jun 13, 2009 11:39 AM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

It's official.

Dwight Howard is a midget in a mechanical suit.

by PolishSausage.Ditka.Bears. on Jun 11, 2009 2:10 PM CDT reply actions   2 recs

Well done.

Be nice. Flag comments that you think are offensive. Use the "reply" button. Drink plenty of water. Compliment others. "Rec" comments and posts you like. Don't call people names. If you don't like someone's comment, attack the comment and not the commentor. Learn the difference in your/you're, then/than, to/too. Exercise. Relax. Stretch often. Find good in the world.

by Dane Noble on Jun 11, 2009 2:16 PM CDT up reply actions   0 recs

Oompa Loompa Doo-pidy doo

We make a lot more money than you.

by DisCUBbobulated on Jun 11, 2009 11:26 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

One more

One small step for Dwight Howard…. One giant step for everyone else

by tommite622 on Jun 13, 2009 2:52 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

im the only white guy..

but still the biggest bad ass

by Bear Lovin 21 on Jun 14, 2009 3:51 PM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Did anyone else notice...

the guy between 50 and DH snickering? Even a dude with Perm thinks this photoshoot is rediculous.

by sheepskinz1 on Jun 15, 2009 5:41 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

Haha... couldn't resist the pick-up line...

One of the guys to a reporter:
“Are you wearing space pants too? Because your @$$ looks out of this world!”

"A lot of fans were drawn to me because they knew that whatever the score was, I was going to run as hard as I could on every play. You don't have that now, you have guys waiting for next week or even next year." - Walter Payton

by HoneyBear on Jun 15, 2009 7:23 AM CDT reply actions   0 recs

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