Photo-Caption Contest: Kyle Orton
by Dane Noble on Jul 20, 2009 1:59 PM CDT
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PrintCongratulations to PolishSausage.Ditka.Bears for being the most recent winner of WCG"s photo-caption contest! (and for having one of the coolest user names) *golfclap for Mr. PS.D.B*
Honorable mentions (other engreeninations)
Robert Rence
Spongie
ifuwannacrownem
Past winners:
Polish chose the photo for this week's contest, and it is one that we are familiar with.
Don't forget to recommend (wreck) your favorites!
Theme: Orton's thoughts on being traded to the Broncos
This FanPost was written by a Windy City Gridiron member, and does not necessarily reflect the ideas or opinions of its staff or community.
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Whoa... What? I got.... Huh?
I am sooooo wasted right now…
When I played I was a triple threat.... Stumble.... Fumble.....Grumble....
by scespy12 on Jul 20, 2009 2:07 PM CDT via mobile reply actions 1 recs
LMAO!
Did anyone see where I put that…ball thingy…? Man I’m hungry.
by Merlin Scott on Jul 20, 2009 4:42 PM CDT up reply actions
Mile High?
I don’t think I’ve ever been that wasted. Or have I…. crap I can’t remember.
I'm teaching fools some basic rules.- MR.T
You mean...
If I drink the same amount of Jack D in Denver that I do in Chicago, I will get twice as drunk….
Sh**, the wife is not gonna like this….
(Asshole Sr) "If you learn one thing here, NEVER pass out in Ohio."
Since marijuana is decriminalized in Denver
I wonder how hard it would be to add a “Smoking Clause” to my contract…?
wake me in September...
by ChiTown2ShineIn'09 on Jul 20, 2009 2:29 PM CDT reply actions
I used to do drugs. I still do drugs. But I used to, too.
Maybe, just once, someone will call me "sir" without adding, "you're making a scene.
by HireMattMillen on Jul 20, 2009 2:29 PM CDT reply actions 3 recs
Nice try
but you messed up the quote… it’s “I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to toot”
wake me in September...
by ChiTown2ShineIn'09 on Jul 20, 2009 2:32 PM CDT up reply actions
Ahhh... very nice sir.
RIP Mitch Hedberg… he was truly a bird of a different feather.
LSU Tigers Baseball... NCAA National Champions- 2009.
amen sir
Maybe, just once, someone will call me "sir" without adding, "you're making a scene.
by HireMattMillen on Jul 20, 2009 2:41 PM CDT up reply actions
I Loved Mitch Hedberg
One of my favorite comedians.
by Sam Householder on Jul 21, 2009 11:20 AM CDT up reply actions
Mitch Hedberg was quality stuff.
“No, I don’t do drugs anymore, either. But I’ll tell you something about drugs. I used to do drugs, but I’ll tell you something honestly about drugs, honestly, and I know it’s not a very popular idea, you don’t hear it very often anymore, but it is the truth: I had a great time doing drugs. Sorry. Never murdered anyone, never robbed anyone, never raped anyone, never beat anyone, never lost a job, a car, a house, a wife or kids, laughed my ass off, and went about my day."
"They lie about marijuana. Tell you pot-smoking makes you unmotivated. Lie! When you’re high, you can do everything you normally do, just as well. You just realize that it’s not worth the **cking effort. There is a difference."
"If you don’t think drugs have done good things for us, then take all of your records, tapes and CD’s and burn them. Because all of those great artist and musicians when they wrote those wonderful songs… Rrrrreeeaal high on drugs. Hell the Beatles were so high, they let Ringo sing a few songs!"
- Bill Hicks
Another great comedian that left us earlier than later.
How about Search Party of 3?
How can you eat at a time like this? There are people eating.
That is off the top of my head, so it may be a bit off, but I love that bit.
Being Who You Thought We Were Since 2005!
Lmao...
Nice work. Did the ever find the Defrenes?
LSU Tigers Baseball... NCAA National Champions- 2009.
hahaha
yea thats one of my favorites. “They are probably locked in a trunk somewhere…and they are hungry!”
also, "If you’re flammible and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit. "
Maybe, just once, someone will call me "sir" without adding, "you're making a scene."
by HireMattMillen on Jul 23, 2009 9:03 AM CDT up reply actions
So then Coach Smith turns to me....
and his face kinda looks like this, and he says, "Kyle, we need to…..
If you can't laugh at yourself you must not be very funny.
Thank goodness.
I’m tired of my hands smelling like pork and pineapple after every game. Damn Olin, use some soap – I’m never gonna get this smell out.
- Smudgers
"Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch." - Dr. Percival Ulysses Cox
My body may be cold, but this neckbeard keeps my face warm.
When you go to somebody's house, you don't crap on their floor. Being a fan of one team does NOT give you license to be a dick to fans of another.
FINALLY!
A team with cheerleards. Mustache rides for all!!!!
I'm teaching fools some basic rules.- MR.T
dammit
Cheerleaders. I’m dumb.
I'm teaching fools some basic rules.- MR.T
by Ditkavsworld on Jul 20, 2009 3:17 PM CDT up reply actions
Cheerleaders + Beards = Cheerleards, or...
- Smudgers
"Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch." - Dr. Percival Ulysses Cox
by David Taylor on Jul 20, 2009 3:28 PM CDT up reply actions
ahahah
Maybe, just once, someone will call me "sir" without adding, "you're making a scene.
by HireMattMillen on Jul 20, 2009 3:30 PM CDT up reply actions
I just wish I hadn't drank all that cough syrup this morning.
"A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject." -Sir Winston Churchill
"We want to create havoc and chaos under an umbrella of discipline, if that makes sense." - Rod Marinelli 7/16/09
"oh damn..."
“your telling me i have to go to a team with NO defense and an ex pats coach…How am I supposed to win games if the defense cant bail me out…even worse…no more FB dives with McKee. well at least i wont have to throw to rashied davis all he does is drop my passes anymore”—-As Orton thinks to himself still hungover from the night of drinking.. since you recently got married maybe you should switch to coors light..i hear its famous in denver.
Bring back our honey bears...sick and tired of hearing about the dallas cowboy cheerleaders and the bars they go work at when they quit. cold weather + cheerleaders in skimpy outfits = lots of fun
Ugh crap...
Now I got this little kid named Josh bugging me about buying him beer and cigarettes…
(Asshole Sr) "If you learn one thing here, NEVER pass out in Ohio."
LOL - literally!
The only way to stop him is to blow his head off…or to put a football in his hands…
by Merlin Scott on Jul 20, 2009 4:34 PM CDT up reply actions
Hey ladies...
I rufied my self.
There are only three types of people; makers, takers, and fakers. Which one are you???
by gaingrene on Jul 20, 2009 6:24 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
lol...he's a pretty big deal
May the wind be always at your back, and may your placekicker have icewater in his veins.
Ever the dutiful team man, Orton misunderstands comments about Mile High Stadium as an instruction to get "a mile high in the stadium".....
"The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt." - Bertrand Russell
I got traded for a probowler?
Holy shit! I’m the greatest Quarterback in Bears history!
Camp ifuwanna, we hold you in our heart...
by ifuwannacrownem on Jul 20, 2009 8:39 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
...it was me.
I know im not suppose to post, but I couldn’t help myself.
by PolishSausage.Ditka.Bears. on Jul 20, 2009 10:08 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
I would definitely wreck this if you were eligible.
- Smudgers
"Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch." - Dr. Percival Ulysses Cox
by David Taylor on Jul 21, 2009 10:31 AM CDT up reply actions
haha thanks guys
I feel the love:)
by PolishSausage.Ditka.Bears. on Jul 21, 2009 1:38 PM CDT up reply actions
no problem. He definitely has that look of 'relief' look to him.
By the way… didn’t you say “let’s do the damn thing!” – where’s your PS entry?
- Smudgers
"Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch." - Dr. Percival Ulysses Cox
by David Taylor on Jul 21, 2009 1:51 PM CDT up reply actions
yes i did say "let's do the damn thing"
you must have wrote this before I let you and everyone else know that I was trying to finish my website before I had some fun with the pics. I didn’t realize a contest would happen so soon but I did want to do something and I did the rex’s used car lot in like 5 minutes just because I made that comment.
by PolishSausage.Ditka.Bears. on Jul 21, 2009 6:28 PM CDT up reply actions
Yeah, wrote it before.
Are you building in Dreamweaver? Jeebus, I hate that program.
- Smudgers
"Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch." - Dr. Percival Ulysses Cox
by David Taylor on Jul 21, 2009 8:54 PM CDT up reply actions
No I'm not actually.
and yes I hate Dreamweaver with a passion. I’m not hip on any web design software or HTML so I found a good template site to use as my website/online portfolio and it’s good enough for me.
by PolishSausage.Ditka.Bears. on Jul 22, 2009 1:15 PM CDT up reply actions
I"m a purist if that still exists as much as possible
I still do all my websites in notepad. Maybe I’m just stubborn.
Being Who You Thought We Were Since 2005!
Don't look at me.
This is what you’d look like too if you stood around as Rex’s backup for this long. At least now I can look like this while I back up Denver’s first round pick NEXT year.
If you can't laugh at yourself you must not be very funny.
To go in a different direction entirely:
“Hey, McDanny, were you this tired after flying here?”
“No, Kyle. Say, did one of the fans I pissed off hit you in the face with a snow ball?”
“Nah. See, I was on the plane, right? And this guy next to me was talking to me about Cutler, because he saw my hat, and he was a Bears fan and stuff, okay? Yeah, so he was drinking some coffee or something, and he asked the flight attendant – oh man, she was hot shit. You should’ve seen this chick, I mean, they didn’t make’em like that at Purdue. Anyways, he said the coffee tasted bad, so she gave him some paper baggies. He put some white powder in his coffee, and some off it spilled onto my tray thingy. So, I looked around to make sure that babe was walking to the back of the plane, then I joined the Mile High Club. Heh, heh…”
“What did I get myself into? I mean, Brady didn’t have to resort to using flight attendants for sex. Wait, do you get nosebleeds at high elevations?”
“No, why do you as-” [Orton collapses]
@bs_uf15bosox9be:OverTheMonster-ALLERGEN WARNING:May contain PB.
I just puked in here, thats the reality.
None you son of bitches try to be heroes.
If God had wanted man to play soccer, he wouldn't have given us arms.- Mike Ditka
by Hurricanes becoming Bears on Jul 21, 2009 1:24 AM CDT reply actions
Orton's thoughts
What the hell happened? Why did they trade me? I’m a legend in Chicago. Then passes out from drinking to much Coors light.
(My first attempt. Be nice)
We are who we think we are.
Does anybody want some coffee?
I can feel Montezuma’s revenge creeping up on me.
"A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject." -Sir Winston Churchill
"We want to create havoc and chaos under an umbrella of discipline, if that makes sense." - Rod Marinelli 7/16/09
"I call this pose.... Magnum!"
I'm teaching fools some basic rules.- MR.T
by Ditkavsworld on Jul 21, 2009 10:13 AM CDT reply actions 4 recs
Id say it was more like Ferarri or Latigra.
Wrecked.
by PolishSausage.Ditka.Bears. on Jul 21, 2009 10:21 AM CDT up reply actions
SHUT UP! Enough already.
Who cares about Kyle Orton anyway? The man has only one look, for Christ’s sake! Blue Steel? Ferrari? Le Tigra? They’re the same face! Doesn’t anybody notice this? I feel like I’m taking crazy pills! I invented the piano key necktie, I invented it! (And also wreck’d)
- Smudgers
"Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch." - Dr. Percival Ulysses Cox
by David Taylor on Jul 21, 2009 10:28 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
LOL
I'm teaching fools some basic rules.- MR.T
by Ditkavsworld on Jul 21, 2009 11:23 AM CDT up reply actions
Maybe "After I drank a magnum of champaign"
That would probably be closer to the look.
We are who we think we are.
by Bearfan1973 on Jul 21, 2009 10:39 AM CDT up reply actions
Orton can't turn left,
or have any touch on the deep ball
by EvilKaramazov on Jul 23, 2009 11:21 AM CDT up reply actions
Hmm
“ahh watever, i know i get the startng job, simms dont got a spleen… but what if my liver gives out?”
"Game 7 of the 2011 Finals.. 10 seconds left in the game, the score is tied up 92-92.. Kobe with the ball he drives in.. IS BLOCKED by bosh, Rose picks it up Runs it down Throws up a pass to Wade.. WADE SCORES! GAME OVER ! BULLS WIN BULLS WIN!"
That's a nice fantasy you got going on in your sig.
@bs_uf15bosox9be:OverTheMonster-ALLERGEN WARNING:May contain PB.
Kyle Orton
rolls his eyes when Chris Simms suggests a drinking contest to win the Denver starting job. “Yeah, like you could win that, Simms,” Orton said.
by Sam Householder on Jul 21, 2009 3:21 PM CDT reply actions 4 recs
I'm thinking I might take that new chick from Logistics.
If things go well I might be showing her my O-face. “Oh… Oh… Oh!” You know what I’m talkin’ about. “Oh!”
- Smudgers
"Newbie, if the next two words out of your mouth aren't 'See ya' then the third word will be 'Oh my god. My crotch. You've punched me in my crotch." - Dr. Percival Ulysses Cox
by David Taylor on Jul 22, 2009 8:09 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
Take her for a ride on the old bone roller coster.
Office Space quote automatic wreck!
I'm teaching fools some basic rules.- MR.T
My shipment of fail just arrived for lack of replyability.
I'm teaching fools some basic rules.- MR.T
by Ditkavsworld on Jul 22, 2009 8:15 PM CDT up reply actions
In Order to Warm Himself Up
on the sideline, QB Kyle Orton relieves himself on the bench.
by Sam Householder on Jul 23, 2009 12:00 AM CDT reply actions 5 recs
Orton auditions to be the new Jello Pudding pitch-man
with his best Cosby impersonation.
"Well, we didn't block real good but we made up for it by not tackling."
- John McKay
by JerBear50 on Jul 23, 2009 5:35 AM CDT reply actions 1 recs
MMmmmmmmm
Doughnuuuttt….
"Well, we didn't block real good but we made up for it by not tackling."
- John McKay
After much searching, Kyle finally finds the Erin Andrews video.
"Well, we didn't block real good but we made up for it by not tackling."
- John McKay
If olin lets one more wet one slip while i'm under center
i will seriously puke. face is turning all purple and whatnot tryin to hold my breath and call the snap count at the same time
Orton films his reaction to the infamous "Two Girls, One Cup" video.
(I know, I know. Nice things and such…)
"Well, we didn't block real good but we made up for it by not tackling."
- John McKay
by JerBear50 on Jul 26, 2009 2:31 AM CDT reply actions 1 recs
Dude!
Sources revealed today that former Bears QB Kyle Orton is actually the son of actor comedian Tommy Chong.!
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