I did not achieve this position in life by having some snot-nosed punk leave my cheese out in the wind.

Chicago Bears' Tommie Harris benefits from friendship with Bo Jackson - I'll be honest, I did not see this one coming.

Chicago Bears' week off means no sure bet in NFL - I am so, so glad that the Trib gave McNeil a weekly article. His one note bashing of the Bears is in no way tiring.

Snub by nightclub just a rookie mistake - What idiot wouldn't want most of the team in his club. Wait, I think it was Pete Wentz's bar. So now it's all coming together.

Numbers show improvement in defense - Improvement back to ass-kickery.

Cutler a spectator again at practice - This is intriguing, but not really newsworthy unless it's next week.

Chicago Bears linebacker Lance Briggs said he'll return after bye week - Hopefully he'll be actually rested and ready, unlike the 'Skins game.

Vermeil remains supportive of Martz - Vote of confidence time, usually means spell of doom.

Childress leaning against Favre start - YES! T-JACK REIGNS SUPREME!!!

Oh yeah, btw: Haynesworth fined for hit on Webb - You may remember this as the play that Webb got a penalty on.

The holidays are right around the corner... get your Ditka Sweater Vest today!