5 Things to Detest During the NFL Season
by Kev H on Aug 12, 2010 3:27 PM CDT
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As we're so close to the season, there are many, many things that we're looking forward to. Seeing players out on the field, playing the game we love to see, in front of tens of thousands of screaming fans.
Football's back, but it's not always sunshine and roses. Let's take a look at five things that I'm not particularly looking forward to during the 2010 NFL Season. No particular order, I tend to hate all of them to varying levels at varying times.
And yes, that is a picture of Charlie Sheen. And yes, you'll figure out why when you go past the jump.
Wednesdays - Wednesdays are the most worthless day of the football season. Let's be honest, you can't breakdown the Monday night game, because you did that on Tuesday. The best you can maybe do is preview the Thursday night game. It's too early to set the majority of your fantasy lineup, because there's still a lot of week left. Nothing good happens on Wednesdays, we should probably just take it out of the rotation completely.
FOX's B, C, D teams - Fox's Other teams are terrible. Kenny Albert, Daryl Johnston, Tony Siragusa, Thom Brennaman, Chris Meyers, Brian Billick, Charissa Thompson, Dick Stockton, Trent Green, Sam Rosen, Tim Ryan, Nischelle Turner, Ron Pitts, John Lynch, Matt Asgersian, Ross Tucker.
We've unfortunately become familiar with any variety of these announcers as the Bears have woefully underperformed, and they've never failed to disappoint with a lack off preparedness (Aroma-Show-Do. Was that so hard?) I just pray the Bears get off to a fast start, not only so that I can be happy as a fan, but so I can hopefully avoid as many of these as possible.
CBS Coverage - I don't inherently mind any real part of CBS' coverage of the NFL. I do, however, mind the fact that I am subjected to seeing eleventy billion commercials for Two and a Half Men. NOTE TO CBS: THIS SHOW IS NOT FUNNY, AND I WANT TO WATCH IT EVEN LESS WHEN I SEE THE SAME TIRED "That one has sex too much", "That one is nerdy and has no sex", "Oh, the housekeeper said something wacky", "Oh, the teen boy says something more adult than he is" promos. NOT FUNNY. NOT FUNNY EVER.
Andy Reid's mustache - It creeps me out.
Favreage of the Favresota Favres as they Favre their Favres out on the Favreball Favre. - ‘Nuff Said here. The lord of the unholy shall wreak havoc amongst our delicate football sensibilities.
What overblown and terrible things trip your trigger during the season? Sound off now! Now, I say!
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How Dick Stockton remains employed is beyond me
Worst. Announcer. Ever.
Completely awful.
Things work out best for those that make the best out of the way things work out - Coach Wooden
he is past his prime
about 20 years past
In the 8th grade Mike Ditka won his school's Science Fair with a model of a working volcano. There were 17 other working volcano's made that day, but only one named Mount Ditka.
by Lester A. Wiltfong Jr. on Aug 12, 2010 4:13 PM CDT up reply actions
Commentary
Damn, people still listen to the commentary? I’ve found unless it’s Gus Johnson there is really no point in leaving the volume above a whisper because no announcers contribute anything enlightening anyway. Gus is good for his potential to go ape shit at any time.
I really wish we could have an option to watch the games with commentary off and like a “sounds of the game” audio instead. Mic up some of the players and just leave that on all day instead of the announcers.
by lopey986 on Aug 12, 2010 4:17 PM CDT via mobile reply actions
In order to follow whats happening
I need play-by-play. I’m legally blind.
If I could get really good AM radio reception, I’d probably just settle for Joniak.
Things work out best for those that make the best out of the way things work out - Coach Wooden
Get Sirius
I have Sirius and I can pause my radio, they broadcast every local home broadcast for every game. So if you have a DVR then you can match the 2 broadcasts together and you have perfect sounding local am broadcasters with whatever your team may be.
Al Michaels makes me want to cut my wrists.
by Berserker333 on Aug 12, 2010 7:58 PM CDT up reply actions
Bears Radio 780
The stream is delayed by a couple of minutes but it’s here and it’s free.
I’ll take Joniak and Thayer over anybody.
"More cowbell" - Bruce Dickinson; "More bell cow" - Lovie Smith
it's also streamed on cb.com
during the season. Or it was last year at least.
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Stupid babies need the most attention!
by David Taylor on Aug 13, 2010 12:35 PM CDT up reply actions
I think it's a link to 780.
When I go to cb.com I’m too overwhelmed by the awesomeness of LM in a dress shirt rocking a football.
"More cowbell" - Bruce Dickinson; "More bell cow" - Lovie Smith
probably so.
And it does have a couple minute delay.
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Stupid babies need the most attention!
by David Taylor on Aug 13, 2010 1:22 PM CDT up reply actions
I just wish he'd stop announcing MMA.
Or at least that he’d tone down the hyperbole a notch or twelve when he does.
"The time has come to get deeply into Football. It is the only thing we have left that ain't fixed." - HST
haha
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Stupid babies need the most attention!
by David Taylor on Aug 13, 2010 12:35 PM CDT up reply actions
+10000000000 on the post.....
…….Joe Buck is the worst of them!!!!!! When Aikman and Buck is announcing, I just turn on the radio and listen to Jeff Joniak.
Is it me,or do the Packers really suck???
by I love football! on Aug 12, 2010 4:36 PM CDT reply actions
I like them
At least they remember they’re at a game and say what just happened. Wish everyone else did that.
Things work out best for those that make the best out of the way things work out - Coach Wooden
AMEN BRUTHA!
Joe Buck is the biggest 13 year-old-girl of a “sportscaster” ever. OOOO Is Tony Romo dating Jessica Simpson? He should just give it up, and write the NFL column for Teen Beat. Or else just go found the Church of The Holy Romo…
I'll second the dope Schlereth
He’s a complete insincere biased turd X 1,000,000.
Listening to Emmitt Smith trying to talk is awkward and unpleasant cause he can’t articulate or formulate a coherent sentence in an entire telecast.
Having to watch that stupid FOX robot strut and dance all around my 50 inch screen makes Hulk very angry.
Hearing ESPN gush week after week about lead Queen B-BBQ Favre, Brady and company, and how old, over used, and not funny the Bermanisms are make me want to upchuck my breakfast, lunch, and dinner (all at once).
"In order to have a winner, the team must have a feeling of unity; every player must put the team first- ahead of personal glory" - motivational sign at Halas Hall.
I like the robot!
Probably because my kids love the robot, but still………
in•san•i•ty \in-ˈsa-nə-tē\ noun
1 : The practice of repeating the same action while expecting different results.
by Timothy Hockemeyer on Aug 12, 2010 6:51 PM CDT up reply actions
Then you will need
…let’s see, was it eight of these…plus one for you. Or just get 53 of them.
"More cowbell" - Bruce Dickinson; "More bell cow" - Lovie Smith
nice.
can’t believe they turned it into an action figure. Funny.
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Stupid babies need the most attention!
by David Taylor on Aug 13, 2010 12:38 PM CDT up reply actions
I like the robot too!
But I’m easily amused. Hahaha.
"A lot of fans were drawn to me because they knew that whatever the score was, I was going to run as hard as I could on every play. You don't have that now, you have guys waiting for next week or even next year." - Walter Payton
Editor/Writer for WindyCityGridiron.com
by Ashley Czuba on Aug 13, 2010 5:46 PM CDT up reply actions
I can't stand that robot either.
WTF is he dancing for? And what does either robots or dancing have to do with football?
It must be one of those teenage + mutant + ninja + turtles (reptiles) marketing schemes. Throw as much stuff that one target market likes, and have yourself a winner. But back to my original point, dancing?
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Stupid babies need the most attention!
by David Taylor on Aug 13, 2010 12:41 PM CDT up reply actions
They should have a big dancing Ditka.
In the 8th grade Mike Ditka won his school's Science Fair with a model of a working volcano. There were 17 other working volcano's made that day, but only one named Mount Ditka.
by Lester A. Wiltfong Jr. on Aug 13, 2010 12:46 PM CDT up reply actions
Td and sack celebrations often lead to dancing.
"In order to have a winner, the team must have a feeling of unity; every player must put the team first- ahead of personal glory" - motivational sign at Halas Hall.
at least Kornhole is gone!
At least ESPN got rid of that D-bag Tony Korn-drama_queen_pansy_heiser! He is still on a short list of people that I really want to punch in the face, repeatably.
Joe Buck - he’s not bad, but him & Aikman are a little too buddy buddy.
CBS – employs only really boring announcers. Also, please remove Shannon Sharpe from the studio – that guy can barely speak English.
Tony Siragusa – I like him (even though he gets side-tracked a lot).
Mike Ditka – why isn’t he calling games anymore. Maybe I’m biased, but you can’t go wrong with Ditka!
Al Michaels is the best in the business if you ask me.
I like Ditka in studio,
but him on play by play… not really my cup of tea.
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Stupid babies need the most attention!
by David Taylor on Aug 13, 2010 12:42 PM CDT up reply actions
You Britons and your damn tea!...
What’s next a Spice Girls reunion tour?!?!?
IT'S NOT TOO LATE TO FIRE LOVIE!
haha.
I’m from SC.
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Stupid babies need the most attention!
by David Taylor on Aug 13, 2010 1:21 PM CDT up reply actions
I believe you're thinking of Spongie.
I used to have a hard time keeping track too.
"The time has come to get deeply into Football. It is the only thing we have left that ain't fixed." - HST
"Joe Buck - he’s not bad"
Your argument is invalid.
Joe Buck is an assault upon the intelligent parts of my brain, the loving parts of my heart and the feeling parts of my soul.
The only thing worse than Joe Buck and Troy Aikman is Joe Buck and Tim McCarver.
"I want to be that guy. I want to be the reason the Bulls are back."- Derrick Rose.
"I'm never leaving Chicago."- Derrick Rose
by Cosmis on Aug 13, 2010 1:23 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
I think Joe Morgan by himself is worse than any other tandem.
Not football, but still terrible.
"The time has come to get deeply into Football. It is the only thing we have left that ain't fixed." - HST
I've found that getting wasted Saturday night
And waking up 5 minutes before kickoff helps to avoid most of the pre-game rubbish. The only downfall is spending all your money on booze Saturday and not having any for Sunday. All of the beer ads are torture at this point.
WILDCARD BITCHES!!! YEEEEHHHAAAAA!!!!!
I heard this nugget once and it makes perfect sense...
“If you wake up hungover, you know that is likely to be the worst you will feel all day; at the start! At that point there’s nowhere to go but feeling better!” I’ve put this theory to the test, and I fully concur. BTW, you need to find a way to drink cheaper!
IT'S NOT TOO LATE TO FIRE LOVIE!
Especially
when you kill your hangover with a nice spicy bloody mary. Best trick to start feeling better!
"In order to have a winner, the team must have a feeling of unity; every player must put the team first- ahead of personal glory" - motivational sign at Halas Hall.
I used to kid myself...
the reason they were so effective was all of the vitamins in the tomato juice!
IT'S NOT TOO LATE TO FIRE LOVIE!
I like Brian Billick, and Trent Green isnt bad either
I would take them any day over Joe Buck and Aikman. But neither of them is worse than tuning into a prime time NCAA football game and hearing stupid Brett Musberger, I cant stand him. Brian Baldinger is definetly my favorite though.
Is there ever a time not to detest Charlie Sheen?
Talk about a guy who doesn’t even try anymore. and he still makes ungodly money for his mediocrity.
"The time has come to get deeply into Football. It is the only thing we have left that ain't fixed." - HST
NFC East overhypage
Agreed on most of the announcers on FOX and CBS sucking. They should just have another version of the game being shown on the FOX/CBS Sports affiliate with the radio announcers replacing the broadcast tv ones. I don’t know what you guys in Chicago gets, but here we have Fox Sports Arizona and they show all of the ASU/UofA, DBacks, Suns, and Coyotes games.
I’d rather leave the radio on for almost every game I watch [except for Monday and Sunday night games since I enjoy their commentators], but the radio is always ahead of what is on TV and that is a pain in the ass sometimes.
Lifelong Arizona Cardinals/Chicago Bears fan [I have always lived in Arizona, dad is from Chicago].
I can't stand fair-weather/bandwagon fans, stick with your team, throughout the good and the bad. And don't switch to whichever team wins the Super Bowl each year.
Insidious
Buck’s a moron, got where he is due to his daddy.
Aikman’s delivery is that of one doing way too much vicodin.
If only the one and only Keith Jackson could do every game, and alone,
football commentary would be enjoyable. Alas, retirement hits all.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQJWtgF60A4
Expectations don't produce!
I loved watching the Dick, Moose and Goose show a couple years ago
For the uninitiated, that’s Dick Stockton, Daryl “Moose” Johnston, and Tony Siragusa. Dick is thoroughly unmemorable, but knows his stuff. The fun was watching Moose and Goose snipe at each other the entire broadcast, and watching Goose break down the line play and get all animated whenever he got pissed.
How about just detesting the NFC East, which can’t really be called the NFC East when one of the teams plays in the desert southwest. Why is Dallas even IN that division anyway? Put them in the South and pull the Panthers back to where they belong. Heck, I detest the way the NFL divisions are currently structured. If you want to go by strict regional locations, the NFL would look like this…
AFC East: Pats, Jets, Bills, Ravens
AFC North: Bungles, Browns, Steelers, Colts
AFC South: Titans, Texans, Jags, Fins
AFC West: Raiders, Broncos, Chargers, Chiefs
NFC East: Giants, Eagles, Skins, Panthers
NFC South: Boys, Falcons, Saints, Bucs
NFC North: Bears, Slack, Queen, Kitten
NFC West: Rams, 9ers, Cards, Chicken
Not to rant or anything…
Uh, if you want to go by strict regional
You should go back to three divisions. There’s no reason the Rams belong in the West anymore.
If I did what I love for a living, what would I do in my free time?
Writer at windycitygridiron.com {-/-} http://www.twitter.com/kdoggers
I have been "cliched" to death.
Why can’t just one network hire an analyst with a brain in their head? It’s all the same recycled nonsense from the season before, and before and before.
Can anybody help me with some “new” cliches??
They aught to just hire the Victoria’s Secret Models and have them read from the teleprompter. At least the booth cutaways would be great.
by Suffering from Chicago Sports on Aug 13, 2010 10:45 AM CDT reply actions
Very fun idea and excellent post!
I’m honestly having trouble conjuring the words, in order to post about how much garbage is spewed our direction on Sundays. So I’ll just say this. A mass majority of the broadcasters/commentators/analysts whatever you want to call them are (by my definition) terrible. I mean awful!
Maybe you have to do it forever, in order to be any good at it. Like Al Michaels, John Madden (I think he was great), Pat Summerall or Keith Jackson… I don’t know.
All I do know is, most suck.
Agreed, except for Madden.
Don’t get me wrong, he was fine at one time. The last few years were painful though. Summerall drunk is better than Madden senile.
"The time has come to get deeply into Football. It is the only thing we have left that ain't fixed." - HST
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