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NightLink: Grossman, Orton, Forte

As we head into the weekend, there is not much going on in the world of the Chicago Bears, other than some news about Matt Forte. 

The Bears are being extra cautious with running back Matt Forte and plan to sit him through at least the next three organized team activities, according to an NFL source. There's a good chance Forte won't participate in any of next week's four sessions, although he will be re-evaluated on Monday. The Bears conclude OTAs on June 18.

All else is quiet, so I decided to leave you with a couple of humerous reads from the Pre-Cutler Era.  Hope you enjoy them...

From The Onion:

Tearful Rex Grossman:  I was Intercepted A Lot As A Child

CHICAGO—Bears quarterback Rex Grossman, responding to being benched following his three-interception performance in a loss to the Dallas Cowboys, had to stop speaking in order to wrestle with his emotions at a post-game press conference Tuesday in which he tearfully admitted to reporters that as a child his friends and family would abuse him mercilessly on the football field by repeatedly picking off all of his throws. "I grew up terrified of what my mother or father would say if I took a sack, so I'd just throw the ball up for grabs as hard as I could," said Grossman, recalling a post-Thanksgiving-dinner outing in which his parents intercepted every pass meant for his friends and vice versa. "My first memory is playing touch football in my backyard and just wishing that the game would end, but they just seemed to go on forever. I'd just close my eyes and throw the ball and pray it would reach the right person, but my dad, uncle, creepy older cousin, or best friend always seemed to take advantage of my poor throws." A sobbing Grossman also confessed that his childhood pet Rocky, an elderly cocker spaniel, would often come up from behind him while he was holding the ball and nuzzle it with such force that he would fumble.

And From Sportssatire.com:

Bears Choose To Play Without A Quarterback This Season

The Chicago Bears have made an unprecedented move today. They have decided to go into the NFL season with no starting quarterback. With nobody emerging as a candidate for the starting job, coach Lovie Smith has decided on nobody.

"We just do not have anyone worthy of putting under center at this time. If I had to make a decision I would simply quit because there is nobody in this camp that can lead this team," said Smith at a news conference announcing his decision.

Smith indicated that the Bears would just use direct snaps to the runningbacks and use all other ten players on the field as blockers. He also said that he would consider punting on first and second down if necessary.

"Yeah, that's definitely an option," said Smith when asked if he would punt early in his team's possessions. "I think you have to consider that. put your defense on the field and hope for the best," he said.

Kyle Orton, who was considered to be the front runner for the starting job has decided to make himself into the punter. He has secretly told friends on the team that he would take the snap when he was supposed to punt and throw passes, even if it meant upsetting his coach.