Well, I hope you are all familiar with the phrase that states that it sometimes takes the worst to bring out the best. Even though that wasn't true for our Bears it certainly was true for your in game comments. After sifting through over 2600 comments I found more than a couple of gems. Join me for the best of, during our worst of, in game comments, plus a few of my comments, and several more commas, after the jump!
To begin this rant let me start off saying that the Bears are an enigma, wrapped inside of a mystery, surrounded by questions, all concealed in a cheesy burrito... This team raises more questions than it answers with each passing week. (Please note passing wasn't intended as a pun) So we won some, we lost one... right??? Except we looked remarkably bad losing. A few things to note. Everyone began commenting on how confuselled Jay looked long before the half. Maybe he really was concussed early on. Everyone was well aware of our lack of a running game throughout the game. And you can go back and watch the progressive lack of faith in the Bears as a team crumble play by play. Except for the defense, they just plain wore out... Enjoy the fruits of your labor, but no "best of" today. Just can't have it during a loss. Many winners but only one loser. Thanks for playing and enjoy....
We set the tone with....
Jonathan Thompson: Wooooooooooooo! First quarter thread and I’m two beers deep already! Thank you for the ulcer Buffalo. Mr. Gaily, I’ll send you my medical bills.
iowabear: My wife just asked me if I’m going to be in a bad mood if the Bears lose.
I think it was a rhetorical question.
Jonathan Thompson: Personally I’ll punt a squirrel if they lose
This was followed by many threats to our tree living rodents. Hope the squirrels are OK.
During the opening we get...
Scribbz: Damn Peppers looks like a stud with the eyeblack and headband
Cubbiegoon: He can sport a tutu and still look bad
kernal316: I'm not gay or a female... But I’d have his babies
Allie: Get in line. :-P
tfrabotta: Didn't we give this big TE big money because he was a good blocker??
dakoose: Angelo signs a shoddy (edit) blocker: Nothing new here.
Allie: Does this staff know that we only get 3 time outs a half? because they burn them like crazy.
David Taylor: WOW! Knox just got Rhianna’d! Too Soon?
After a direct tv commercial we get the best description of the night in this little clip:
Me: I want a miniature giraffe
David Taylor: I knew a girl in College. That looked like one
.
David Taylor: Tall, large backside, super long neck.
Jonathan Thompson: Mother of God
After the most bizarre play of the night we get this....
David Taylor: That's why Edwin Williams was promoted. Because of his excellent tackling ability… of course it was on his own player, but…
Or this bit
David Taylor: I wanna see Virginia walking the sidelines like Jerry Jones!
Maelvampyre: sweet mother of pearl!!…in stockings and garters!
David Taylor: Yes... or in an old school adidas sweat suit with a Flavor Flav clock and a kangol.
Lowlight of the thread:
Kev H: Is it just me, or is Virginia looking particularly fine tonight?
Jonathan Thompson: I’d hit it
Let’s establish the ground rules here:
Allie: You don't get to "First" your own thread.
Allie: i think its a game thread not a book club meeting. fewer questions. more cursing.
After some discussion about resetting the game like you would on a video game we get the awkward story of the night. Please say you weren’t like, 15.....
Kev H True Story When i was a little kid, I was doing that to one of my NES cartridges. My mom asked me what I was doing, and I said I was giving it a blowjob. She looked at me and said, "No, don’t ever say that again." And walked out of the room. It was 5 more years before I understood why.
David Taylor: We should really try that tackling thing!
Again with the squirrels
Jonathan Thompson: I'm going to punt the fornication (edit) out of a squirrel
Spongie: Better than the other way around…..
Even better out of context:
Jonathan Thompson: Because they're like fat chicks in bed They have something to prove And they’re always hungry
This one summed up the night. From the 2nd QT thread....
Fridge72: At this point, I’m not sure that we should put the offense back out there.
I’ll edit every other letter and hope this one flies. It was epic:
northernsails: G*D%A$M#T^U@K*N#B&T!H*S^E&T#N&C!C*S%A*B@R!!!
BL3ACH: jay what are you DOING?
David Taylor: it's called sucking, I think.
Jupree: Celebrating Lovie's 100th Bears game coached
Again we have this...
Cosmis: I'm going to light Mike Tice on fire.
Jonathan Thompson: I'll be there To throw a burning squirrel at him
Jhitt81: Maybe if we get omiyale a snickers he will stop playing like betty white?!?!?!
shawndgoldman: butbutbutbutbut MIKE TICE!
Another one that stands better on its own
Maelvampyre: ok, I'll put away my pink g string
JoeCB1991: Right now I feel like the entire O-Line should jump off a darned (edit) cliff into a pit of freaking (edit) burning gosh darned (edit) spikes. This crap is pissing me off.
After a "we shot ourselves in the foot" comment we have
Cosmis: and miss foot then have bullet richocet back into own face. Proceed to pour salt on face and then stagger through open window to your death.
Best reply of the night with massive editing....
Bearnecessities: FUdge FUdge FUdge FUdge FUdge FUdge FUdge FUdge
Suffering from Chicago Sports: Fewer Fudges than Sacks.
T-Train: The whole record setting 9 sacks thing would seem to back your statement up emphatically. Matadors of the Midway, you are truly earning the title.
62GTO: wwls... what would lovie say?
Allie: something slow and slightly dumb.
boondock_saint812: Watching this game is like Rocky watching Apollo Creed get killed by Drago.
Talk about overreacting...
Bear Lovin 21: I just dont know how to react anymore bring rex back
The real answer to this conversation is so that I can include it here....
Jonathan Thompson: Peppers With a bat down
Sir Buckets: Jonathan, let me ask you: what did your post contribute? If someone had seen the play, you’re just stating the obvious. If someone hadn’t seen it yet, like say, me, all you did was spoil it. Cmon’ man.
Arbusto: You just summarized 90% of game thread posts What did your post contribute?
When our sense of humor runs out of humor we get...
tfrabotta: I have to say Melton is looking awesome on 3rd down rush
PrincetonCubs: +1 getting great penetration.
PrincetonCubs: sigh preemptive TWSS
Sir Buckets: Let Peppers play QB. He's doing everything else...
Another gem out of context...
Fridge72: I would stick a nipple on it if I had one.
BearNecessities: blind paraplegics could tackle better than our secondary
northernsails: You know what...Collinsworth needs his lips sewn shut.
juperee: He would just start talking out of his buttocks (edit) then. Oh, wait, he’s already there.
Toward the beginning of the 4th qt. thread we get this...
HawkinExile: This thread has the scent of victory in it.
shawngoldman: are you a giants fan? ;-)
DocPepper: Bears Breaking News In the stat sheets, the OLine will now be listed as the LOLine
Allie: giants wore themselves out wailing on jay is exhausting.
For tfrabotta.... This was ALL MY BAD.... Sorry JoCro... The team (and me) let this young man down. Hard core. For restitution to his harmless comment I submit....
Me: Frick (edit) you troll!
BL3ACH: I think he is a Bears fan?
JoCro: To this point, during my weekend I had: Watched my HS football team dominate. Got a personal record in a cross country invitational. Received my AP Scholar with Distinction award. Received my Maryland Distinguished scholar Honorable Mention award. Got a free weight bench. Asked out the girl I’m in love with.Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd Sunday Night Football? Great way to cap it off, guys.
Fridge72: Got to try to stay positive somehow, otherwise I’ll drink all my booze before the game ends.
You know things are bad when you get this...
Maelvampyre: good lord, virginia mccaskey could have thrown that pass better
Cloudy Future: OK I am back….Did I miss anything?
suckmyditka: a lot of Fudge (edit) and some stuff (edit) and a little Gosh darn it (edit)
Jhitt81: A bus and Jerry looking for someone to throw under it!
For randomness:
suckmyditka: penis
Bizzarre yet funny, not unlike the game after a while...
DocPepper: Why don't the bears run the toss?
suckmyditka: because you touch yourself at night
DocPepper: Sorry everyone! sorry! My bad!
Maelvampyre: we got em right where they want us!
Suffering from Chicago Sports: Tirbune Sport ReportsBears holding Open Tryouts starting tomorrow at Noon.
no.fair.weather.fan: how many QBs did we dress tonight?
Maelvampyre: none, they were all naked.
Best idea of the YEAR...
shawndgoldman: After Hanie Angelo gets to play behind the line he's assembled.
To finish it off...
62bearsthe best: I wonder if Hanie had last rites before coming in