Preseason game 4: Bears er..., Browns ? - The Best of the In-Game Threads

I looked it up and the final score was 28-20 to us, if anyone cared. Judging by what was going on in the second half thread towards the end, nobody was paying it much attention as things got... well, see for yourself after the jump!

I have confidence in sunshine...
ES46NE10: Time for the Bears to make Colt McCoy look amazing

Don't mess with him.
David in Maine: Jeff Dickerson: Cutler just tossed a 60-yard strike to QB coach Jeremy Bates in warmups.
Steven Schweickert: Ladies and gentlemen, your sixth receiver!
C-Razzle: Sanz just can't get a break...
Steven Schweickert: No, it just means Sanz is going to make Bates "disappear."

There's a photoshopped pic on my computer somewhere of Porkins with a bucket of KFC.
ThorCo: Orange 15 Checking in
Jack's Elsewhere: Orange 6 standing by

Alas.
chiguy8506: sadly its a sober night for me
ThorCo: Its a somber night for everyone: JMarcus Webb is our starting LT. oh you said sober

We're not saying Corey Wootton is injury-prone, but... that's exactly what we're saying.
David in Maine: Wooton Time… hopefully he shows something….
T.J. Shouse: like what his femur looks like?

It's novel, I'll grant you that.
whoyouthoughtiwas: dane apparently likes returning on all fours.

Ewww.
bassist33: I think we found our scat back. That’s nasty!

WCGers had theories about Robbie Gould's uncharacteristic missed field goal...
ES46NE10: Cleveland's miasma of suck has infected Gould. get him out of there, stat
DaHamsta: Gould is curious as to what a miss looks like

And it was only the first quarter...
Steven Schweickert: Oh dear. Notes tonight is going to be an adventure and a half.

Gesundheit.
DaHamsta: Xavier Adibi
whoyouthoughtiwas: you fall on the keyboard or something?

Does that mean we don't get the Lombardi?
ES46NE10: Sanzenscore. stupid Mayans and their stupid end of the world

Awkward and amusing. Did I mention the awkward?
ThorCo: No way was Cutler talking to a back up there
bassist33: "Hey, how long have you been in the league? Wait, I don’t care, go [Edit: Martz] yourself!"
Higgins: That's the same kind of motivation my father used. "Oh, you still live here?! Go [Edit: Martz] yourself."
Higgins: My reply "It's my eighth birthday Dad. Please sober up."

Dolphins class? Oh.
crackedcactus: Stuck in ago FIN class. What's worse Finance or preseason game 4
ES46NE10: having to watch the jets

NFL Network's Sound FX: Uncut.
Sam Householder: Watching Weems and Sanzenbacher out at WR must make Cutler stand and chuckle and say "Yeah…that’s how it’s been around here at receiver…a bunch of shrimps!"
frenchbears113: "And I made 'em all look like HOF'ers mutha[Edit: Martzers]!!!!!"
Higgins: "Also, who are you? Go [Edit: Martz] yourself."

That's the other Droppopotamus.
crackedcactus: How's my Dropapotamus doing?
Higgins: Pretty good. He's in a gutter somewhere drinking.

No wonder we all use google.
Just Dave: This isn't nearly as much fun when you can't actually, ya know, watch the game.
Spongie: Off naked fishing again?
Just Dave: Sitting alone in my basement googling myself.
David in Maine: Is that what they're calling it these days?
Higgins: That's how Stevie Wonder went blind.
whoyouthoughtiwas: had to shave his hands before every performance. true story
Jack's Elsewhere: He googled his gerschmoodle one too many giggities

Win. Sheer win.
T.Moore: jersey shore cancelled… all is right with the world
Jack's Elsewhere: We have "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo" (pic)
David in Maine: Ugggghhhh My eyes!!!!
ThorCo: what the hell is that
ES46NE10: time has not been kind to you, matthew stafford

Good point, well made.
Spongie: I have trouble understanding the geico gecko’s accent. It’s not very… crisp.
GtM: Dude Its a talking gecko, give ’em a break

Yesh!
Steven Schweickert: Corey Frey. DRINK!
bmbrock: oh, do thou gudys dplay the drinkd every time sam rosen sayssstomething stupen\d too?

Can't argue with that.
Steven Schweickert: Due to general apathy and lack of comments, this is your thread for the second half. Lunch has been cancelled due to lack of hustle. Deal with it.
Higgins: If you think cancelling lunch is going to get me to hustle then you need to reevaluate your motivational methods.

I have no idea who this is that Jack's Elsewhere posted...
bassist33: I know it's terrible to hit women, but I want to punch her in the face soooooo bad right now.
Higgins: If you freeze a meatloaf and hit her with that, she probably won’t even notice or mind.
Valhallen: its funny bc shes fat
Higgins: I have a subtle humor most don't get.

Is that what "unleash the dragon" refers to?
lmfsilva: Well, sometimes you gotta unleash the dragon.
Higgins: That's a good way to land on the Megan's law website.

This actually happened. Me going to bed in the third quarter, I mean. I'm still not sure about Lovie smiling.
Spongie: I think I need to go to bed, I’m hallucinating that Lovie cracked a smile after the punt block return for a TD…

Sadface :-(
T.J. Shouse: Onto the 4th qrtr thread... oh wait…
GtM: I feel empty
T.J. Shouse: TWSS?
GtM: Now I feel emptier

See what happens when WCG's womenfolk don't turn up in in-game threads?
T.J. Shouse: from arguing to a gay orgy. this is what happens when the games over

If only we had a guy who could photoshop around here...
chiguy8506: I think the Manatee has a son. they really just called the name during the byu-wash-state game
T.J. Shouse: is he big, fat, slow, and a [Edit: dilfy] blocker?
T.Moore: Son of Manatee sounds like a cheap [Edit: dilfy] B movie
B.B.BH: which means it will be made into a full length 3d film. Can’t wait for this one.
T.J. Shouse: Mantee Double d
nfts: does that come in 3D??
T.J. Shouse: yup, so you can really see the fatfolds
nfts: Ohhh now thats worth 12 dollars to watch!

Probably not the kind of "Bear" you were expecting!
B.B.BH: My first active open thread and somehow i ended up in a strange place where Bears are group hugging and hens are chasing roosters
chiguy8506: and to think its only the preseason
MidWayMonster54: Yeah it gets kinda weird for regular season games. This was tame in comparison
B.B.BH: i think now all we need is a leprechaun riding a unicorn farting rainbows
Just Dave: That'd be TJ Shouse.
T.J. Shouse: he [Edit: dilfs] rainbows thank you very much

Bonus: from the roster cuts threads.
ThorCo: you has tweeter? you follow me? I tell jokes
Ditkavsworld: No you don't.
T.J. Shouse: Yes he does. 'member the one about Nickelback being good? Hilarious.

The action starts for real on Sunday and we'll be there. Here. You know what I mean. See you then!