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What Foods do the 2017 Bears Inspire?

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San Francisco 49ers v Chicago Bears
Floyd is supposedly up to 250lbs. He probably didn’t get there by eating these foods.
Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images

For those of you who haven’t heard, Reuben Foster (perhaps inevitably), has a sandwich attached to him. In fact, it’s not uncommon for athletes to get foods named after them, especially in their home town or in the city they play for. That led to some of us wonder whether or not there are any foods out there that are named after the Beloved.

Obviously, this could be easily researched on the internet. However, that seems like more work than simply guessing what foods might be named after the 2017 Bears (and what descriptions of those foods might entail). So, without any sort of hope that the suggestions below match reality, here are some humble possibilities for area restaurants to consider, starting with recent additions:

New Menu Items

TruBiscuits and Gravy

North Carolina charm comes to Chicago! These biscuits are famed for their potential taste, unspoiled by too much time on the field in the oven. Coming soon (ask server for availability).

Adam Shaheetas

The Chipotle-stuffed small-town dish is ready for the big time!

Of course, there are also staples Bears fans should be getting use to by now:

Specialty Items

The “No Gains Loggains” Platter

Features fried rattlesnake, guaranteeing that the plate won’t be burdened with anything that was capable of running.

The “Pace Special” Free Agent Buffet

A selection of discount items served all-you-can eat style, usually (but not limited to) yesterday’s special and dishes that never quite worked out on their own.

Finally, there are a couple of selections that are no longer available:

Discontinued Items

Marc’s Mussels

These moules-frites capture the most important part of the former head coach, since they—like the man who once helmed the Beloved—lack any spine.

Obviously, these are just some possible ideas. With Chicago’s rich culinary tradition, there is a lot of room for more ideas in the comments section below!