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Cold Takes: A Look At Chicago’s Demolition Of Detroit

Things look a bit different when you set emotions aside and go back and watch the tapes a couple of times...

NFL: Detroit Lions at Chicago Bears
Chicago Bears head coach Matt Nagy (R) talks with Detroit Lions head coach Matt Patricia (L) after the game at Soldier Field.
Kamil Krzaczynski-USA TODAY Sports

We’ve all seen the “Hot Takes” from the last weekend’s games all over the net.

In this series, I’m letting some time pass, and after reviewing the game tape a couple of times, I’m going to share some “Cold Takes.” about the Bears demolition of the hated NFC North rival Detroit. I’ll also sprinkle in a few thoughts about our division rivals. These are just a series of my thoughts and observations about the game as well as the Bears in general up until this point, presented in no particular order.

  • My game ball goes to Mitchell Trubisky, because that was one heck of a game by the young man. Runner up? Khalil Mack & Allen Robinson II are tied.
  • Guess who started Mitchell Trubisky & Alan Robinson this week in my fantasy league.
  • Cody Parkey went DOINK! off the upright. Then, Cody Parkey went DOINK! off the upright. Then, Cody Parkey went DOINK! off the upright. Then, Cody Parkey went DOINK! off the upright. Not only that, but he consistently kicks his kickoffs returnable. Unacceptable. There was some breeze at Soldier Field, but it wasn’t from the wind... it was the air flowing towards Parkey because he was sucking so much.
  • There are reports that Parkey has not practiced at Solider Field. If true, then both Parkey and special teams coach Chris Tabor should be blasted for that. How on earth is he going to learn how to kick at Solider Field without, you know, actually kicking at Soldier Field?
  • Upon further review, when Parkey missed his first extra point he was kicking towards the south end zone and the ball doinked off the west upright. On the ensuing kickoff, the ball floated the the west side of the field as well. On the second doinked extra point, it was to the north end zone, and again, he missed with the ball floating west. That kickoff floated off to the west side as well.
  • Brian Callahan made a really nice pick, I’m glad we are teaming him up with Kurt Fuller back there in the backfield along with Amukmara.
  • On Mitchell Trubisky’s TD, the delayed block by Jordan Howard was a thing of beauty.
  • I told everybody before the season started “just wait, you will see all of the things Taquan Mizzell can do for Chicago!” And now you have. Those things generally involve stinking up the joint. Not my greatest prediction ever.
  • That was totally a fumble by Kenny Golladay, shame we didn’t get the flag out quicker, that would have been a reversal.
  • Key play in the game, third quarter after Detroit had scored to make it a two TD game at 26-10, Mitchell Trubisky hit Anthony Miller for a huge gain. That was a turning point in the game. Of course, Parkey kicked (again, facing south) and doinked it off the west upright.
  • Speaking of Miller, that unsportsmanlike call was WEAK. C’mon, No Fun League, that was a bit Mickey Mouse. Oh, sorry, Disney isn’t a corporate sponsor? My bad.
  • Missed call of the day by the officials? A monumental, massive and nasty horsecollar tackle on Adrian Amos as he was returning the ball that Prince Amukamara (his jersey was corrected by the second half) forced out in a fumble.
  • Tarik Cohen can take a hit, and man did he get hit. It was a clean shot, too. Cohen later tweeted this:
  • Of course, after Cohen took that hit and the Bears drove on, Cody Parkey missed another field goal towards the south end. He doinked it west, yet again.
  • Missing all four kicks that he doinked with all of them fading the same direction tells me that he needs to get his ass to Soldier Field and spend some damned time there figuring out whatever air currents there are that are blowing.
  • I’ve been a journalist for 35 years now, and I am 100 percent positive I have never used the words “doink” and “doinked” so many times in a single article before.
  • The Bears sacked Stafford 6 times. The Vikings, the previous week, sacked him 10 times. That’s a Mike Martz level of sacks. I’m no offensive coordinator, but I would think you could do SOMETHING to cut down on them, somehow or other.
  • I’m not sure Jim Bob Cooter is much of an offensive coordinator either, and a lot of Lions fans are agreeing with me. I’m not sure having the perfect name for a country music singer qualifies somebody to set up NFL blocking schemes.
  • Leonard Floyd got his first sack on the year, but he also had 3 pressures and played great in the run support game yet again.
  • Second half, Trubisky threw two absolute lasers in a row, the first to Trey Burton for big yardage and the second to Allan Robinson for his second score of the game. Pinpoint, on target, and this score was huge to put the game out of reach.
  • The Bears went for 2, and Trubisky hit Burton on a ridiculously easy looking throw in the corner of the end zone (the same side where Parkey had been doinking his kicks, the west stand side).
  • The Bears have already had enough success to show that the trend of hiring a strong young offensive mind to turn a team around is a trend likely to continue next year. The number one guy on everybody’s list? John Defilippo, Minnesota’s offensive coordinator. There’s nothing better than your top division rival losing their OC after just one year of installing a new offense. I love it.
  • In fact, since there’s VERY good chance of a turnover in Green Bay as well as a nearly guaranteed OC change in Detroit, we could see all three of our division rivals installing new offenses next season as we fine tune our’s under Nagy. Sweet.
  • This interview with Oakland Raiders owner Mark Davis is great, Davis admits that he’s doinked his entire franchise worse than Cody Parkey’s doinking uprights. He takes the blame all on himself off of Jon Gruden. OK, Mark, fair enough. You are an idiot. That makes Jon Gruden a blameless idiot instead of a full-scale idiot.
  • During the game, the TV announcers stated that Prince Amukamara should have dropped that interception intentionally instead of being selfish and catching it. I completely disagree. If you have a chance to get a pick, get the pick.
  • On the other hand, Kurt Fuller or Brian Callahan might have just knocked the ball away.

So what do you think Bears fans? Spill the beans!