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Bears Meet with Cottontail

The prospect out of Bunny Trail University could add an element of elusiveness to the Chicago Bears’ team.

NRL Rd 7 - Rabbitohs v Bulldogs
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Photo by Mark Metcalfe/Getty Images

The reinvention of the Chicago Bears continues, and this time Ryan Pace is taking the rebuild to mythic proportions. Sources close to the team have confirmed that the Bears are trying to schedule a meeting with Peter Cottontail of Bunny Trail University.

In what a few considered a major snub, Cottontail was not invited to the NFL Combine. Some claimed it was because of his small size and others thought it was because his school failed to play any televised games, but accusations of species-ism were also raised. Nonetheless, at private workouts Cottontail has impressed. “He has some serious hops, for sure,” mentioned one NFL scout, referring to prospect’s vertical (and horizontal) leap.

Pace’s reported interest certainly matches the GM’s established preference for gifted athletes, even if it is unclear at the moment what position Cottontail would be suited to in the NFL. One talent evaluator explained: “Look, he has family that has played well on defense—his cousin is a real Thumper, you know? But I just don’t know if that’s his best role.”

Not everyone is as certain about Cottontail’s value. A football executive who spoke under the condition of anonymity explained: “I like Peter, I do. The problem is that he disappears at times. On occasion, it’s like he doesn’t even exist.” Regardless of these complaints, few doubt his locker-room presence. One teammate offered this assessment: “Cottontail’s always very generous. Leaves little gifts for the other guys. He’s always involved and egging others on.”

If the BTU product does join the Bears, first-time head coach Matt Nagy would likely find a use for his talents. Nagy’s inventiveness and offensive acumen won him the job in Chicago, and so there’s little doubt he could incorporate the unique skill-set offered by any prospect, even one as unconventional as Cottontail.

The actual date of the visit is still up in the air, though, with many friends of Cottontail explaining that Sunday was especially busy for him, but that things would settle down afterward. His college coach had nothing but praise to offer for the prospect.

“The Bears would be getting a special player. I know he’d learn anything Nagy wanted him to pick up. Kid’s all ears.”